I used to be a dull John Doe. Thanks to Huawei, I’m now James Bond!

Something for the Weekend, Sir? The name’s McLeod. Alessandro McLeod. I am a spy for the secret services.

You must now be assuming I must be pretty rubbish at this secret agent thing if I’m telling you this here, rather like the way Kelvedon Hatch isn’t terribly adept at being a secret nuclear bunker.

Not to worry, I’m not spying for the British Secret Services anyway, I’m doing it for China. It turns out that it’s really easy to do. As I understand it, all you need to get into the spying game on behalf of everyone’s favourite inscrutable superpower is to own something with a Huawei logo on it.

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